What if our region was the setting for a TV comedy?

Random Thoughts

Random Thoughts columnist Michael Levy thinks our region may be a good setting for a TV show…

‘Farm to Table’

By Michael Levy
Journal & Press

A few weeks ago, I was driving through Scranton, Pennsylvania, and had to jump on a video conference call from my car. The moment I mentioned where I was, the floodgates opened, people started referencing “The Office,” asking if I was stopping by Dunder Mifflin, and tossing out shoutouts to various Scranton landmarks from the show.

Now, to be honest, aside from the Steamtown National Historic Site, the Lackawanna Coal Mine Tour, and grabbing a Cosmo’s cheesesteak, there’s not a lot I’d enthusiastically recommend in Scranton. (Full disclosure: I lived there for a year or two as a kid, and I mostly remember it as a city riddled with crime and surprise sinkholes from collapsing coal mines. My most vivid memory? In preschool, a girl bit me, unprovoked, right on the rear end with such intensity that I bled for hours. She did this in front of several adults and a newspaper photographer from the Scrantonian. Every time someone says, “that’ll come back to bite you in the ass,” I think fondly of my pint-sized attacker.)

Contrast that with what happens when I say I’m from Greenwich, New York. People usually ask if that’s part of New York City. I tell them, “Not exactly,” and end up needing a map, a whiteboard, and 15 minutes to explain. No one has ever heard of it, probably because there are no TV shows about Greenwich. No fictional paper companies are located here and there are no iconic intro theme songs.

So, I had a thought: what if there were a TV show about Southern Washington County? What would that even look like? Here is my thought-

“Farm to Table” will be an American mockumentary-style television comedy series created by yours truly. Set in rural Washington County, New York, the show follows a disgraced New York City branding executive who relocates here as part of a self-imposed redemption campaign. The series blends quirky rural charm with satirical takes on influencer culture, food trends, and community life.

The basic premise of this show is this – after a humiliating PR disaster involving a fake “artisanal” cheese brand (actually made in a factory in New Jersey with powdered milk from South America), New York City branding executive Maxine “Max” Robbins is put on indefinite sabbatical. Her only shot at salvaging her career: rebrand herself.

Her plan? Move to Washington County, NY, for one year to launch a farm-to-table café and produce a “real” documentary about local agriculture and sustainable food systems.

What starts as a performative redemption arc quickly spirals into chaos. Max has zero farming experience, no clue how to cook, and a general aversion to hard work. Her original plan, to use the locals as colorful content for her “farm to table” documentary, hits a snag when those same locals turn out to be complicated, stubborn, and deeply weird in ways she never saw coming.

As she fumbles through goat-milking, hay baling, syrup feuds, haunted barns, and county fairs, Max slowly starts to care about the people she once saw as punchlines. And maybe, just maybe, this vibrant rural area is changing her more than she’s changing it.

Here is the Main Cast of Characters:

Maxine “Max” Robbins (30s) – Former NYC brand strategist, now a fish out of water in farm boots and yoga pants. Overconfident, always camera-ready, and completely unprepared for rural life. Our lovable disaster.

Officer Doug Herndon (40s) – Local cop and self-proclaimed thespian. Directs a local community theater and patrols traffic in a Shakespeare cape. Takes the documentary crew very seriously. He’s polite, theatrical, and completely unaware that he is a bad actor. His relationship with Max will be a “will-they, won’t-they” relationship like Sam and Diane on “Cheers”.

Aggie Caplow (70s) – Alpaca farmer, soap maker, conspiracy theorist, and barefoot oracle of “Wit’s End Farm.” Maintains her rent-control apartment in NYC despite having lived in Washington County for decades. Deeply suspicious of Max but convinced she’s some sort of cosmic disruption sent by the heavens.

Caleb Kwong (20s) – Deadpan Gen Z squash farmer and aspiring social media influencer. Fluent in memes and sarcasm. Reluctantly agrees to film Max’s content in exchange for sound gear. Often just wants to “vibe and grow vegetables.”

Tim and Marilyn Havey (50s) – Estranged siblings and bitter maple syrup rivals. Their syrup farms face each other across the road, and they only communicate through aggressive signage and acts of sabotage.

Amanda (30s) – The always unseen but all-seeing documentary producer. Off-camera voice of reason, resigned to capturing Max’s descent into rural life. A former PBS documentarian who regrets everything that has happened in her life so far.

Here is the Season One Episode Guide:

Episode 1 – “Welcome to Moo York”

Max arrives and immediately offends the locals when she says something about inbred residents. Chickens attack. Max’s café opens with zero food.

Episode 2 – “The Pancake Accord”

Max tries to end the Havey syrup feud by hosting a tasting event at her café. Someone spikes the waffles and the alpacas take sides.

Episode 3 – “Sheriff of Notting Barn”

Officer Doug casts Max as Maid Marian in a Robin Hood play. She bombs. Caleb’s homemade fog machine causes a barn theater fire during the performance. A goat escapes and causes mayhem.

Episode 4 – “Farming for Likes”

Max attempts a gardening livestream. Falls into a compost pile. Caleb turns the footage into a music video. It goes viral online.

Episode 5 – “Maple Mayhem”

Max judges the county’s syrup contest and accidentally awards first place to a bottle of Mrs. Butterworth. Public outrage ensues. She writes an unhinged apology in the Greenwich Journal and Salem Press.

Episode 6 – “Ghosts, Goats & Gossip”

The farmhouse might be haunted. Aggie leads an alpaca séance. Unknowingly and unexpectedly, Doug shows up in a Victorian ghost costume after his performance at a local play. Chaos ensues.

Episode 7 – “Firehouse Follies”

Max hosts a charity bingo night at the firehouse and offends everyone with her commentary about what she thinks are the best things about living in Greenwich. The potluck dinner sparks a fire because of something Max did. Literally! And the firehouse burns down.

Episode 8 – “Crop Circles & Aliens”

Crop circles appear on a local field. Aggie blames aliens. Officer Doug opens a full investigation. Caleb refuses to comment.

Episode 9 – “Cows and Consequences”

Max purchases a cow at the auction house to win over locals. Accidentally violates several health codes by serving raw milk in her café. Max’s café gets temporarily shut down by the health department, but her cow wins a ribbon at the Washington County Fair.

Episode 10 – “Harvest Moon” (Season Finale)

Max throws a community harvest dinner to prove she belongs. The food is terrible, the pigs escape, but the entire town pulls together. Max may finally be one of them.

What began as damage control for this discredited ad executive becomes something surprisingly wholesome…and hilarious. As Max stumbles through Washington County, she learns that true community isn’t something you brand, it’s something you earn. She came to film a documentary. But what she found was her second chance with a random thought or two served on the side.

Michael Levy is a retired government manager residing in Greenwich NY and is employed now as a technical consultant. He is also a Commercial Pilot and a Ham Radio operator.